Week 7.4 – The Museum

Previously: Digger and Twain were on a recon of the museum they intended to rob, when shots rang out. And now…

The sound had come from one of the galleries further back in the building. Jerry the guard ran toward the sound, his hand on the butt of his pistol. Natalie ducked behind the counter and snatched up the receiver of the phone as Digger pulled his arms out of their constricting slings and ran after Jerry. A shrill “YEEE-HAWWWW!” echoed through the mostly deserted galleries above the sound of Digger’s skater jeans flapping.

Digger entered the Asian gallery and slid to a stop at Jerry’s side. His jaw dropped in shock at what he saw.

Jeff Twain was dressed as a cowgirl, with a curly blonde wig and buckskin miniskirt with white hat and boots. In one hand, he held a pistol, and in the other, what looked like an ancient crystal cup. “I’m Bellicose Jane, and my legs are killing me!” he shouted as he aimed the pistol at Jerry. “Don’t do anything stupid, hombre.”

Jerry tensed next to Digger. “What the hell is with this guy?” he muttered.

“What are you doing?” Digger nearly shouted. “You said this was just a recon.”

Jerry looked at Digger, startled. “You’re with him?”

“YEEEE-HAWWWW!” Twain shouted and ran past the two of them, out of the room.

Digger stood dumbfounded, staring after his sort-of partner, noticing that Twain either had very little body hair or had actually shaved his legs to look better in his costume. Something hit him hard in the small of his back, knocking him down.

He rolled to his feet and faced behind him, toward Jerry. The guard’s pistol was drawn and aimed at Digger. “I knew something wasn’t right about you,” Jerry said. “Don’t move.”

“Jesus,” Digger said. “Your girlfriend grabs my ass, and I’m the bad guy?”

“She’s not my…”

But by that time, Digger had leapt up to stick to the wall. Jerry tracked his pistol up to shoot at Digger, but by the time he pulled the trigger, Digger was already running up the wall and across the ceiling. Bullets pounded into the plaster behind him as he ran. He leaped toward the gallery entrance, twisted to land on his feet and blocked a final shot with his right Driller. The bullet ricocheted and shattered an ornate vase to Digger’s right. Before the pieces had finished breaking on the hardwood floor, Digger was out of the gallery. “You’re paying for that!” he shouted back at Jerry.

Digger sprinted through the galleries faster than any human. Ahead, he heard another “YEE-HAW!” from Twain and a shriek from Natalie as a shot rang out.

He passed through the entry hall a moment later. Natalie cowered behind her counter. “Sorry,” Digger shouted as he ran past. “We’re just borrowing it. You’ll get it back, I promise.”

And then Digger was outside, shielding his eyes against the bright glare of the sun. He spotted a cowgirl clad in buckskin disappearing into an alley to his left and dashed after her. Him. Damn it, what had just happened?

What did happen? Find out in the next exciting episode!

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